Broken

Hello reading people :)

I hope you're all having a very pleasant Saturday afternoon...

I came across this song, just randomly, and it completely touched me. Thought I should share.. :)

The broken clock is a comfort
It helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow
From stealing all my time
And I am here still waiting
Though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best
Like you’ve already figured out

I’m falling apart
I’m barely breathing
With a broken heart
That’s still beating
In the pain
There is healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I’m holding on (I’m holdin’ on) (I’m holdin’ on)
I’m barely holding on to you

The broken locks were a warning
You got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded
I’m an open book instead
And I still see your reflection
Inside of my eyes
That are looking for purpose
They’re still looking for life

I’m falling apart
I’m barely breathing
With a broken heart
That’s still beating
In the pain (In the pain)
Is there healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I’m holding on (I’m still holdin’ on) (I’m holdin’ on)
(I’m still holdin’ on) (I’m holdin’ on)
I’m barely holding on to you

I’m hanging on another day
Just to see what, you will throw my way
And I’m hanging on, to the words you say
You said that I will, will be okay
The broken light on the freeway
Left me here alone
I may have lost my way now
But I haven’t forgotten my way home

I’m falling apart
I’m barely breathing
With a broken heart
That’s still beating
In the pain (In the pain)
There is healing
In your name (In your name)
I find meaning
So I’m holding on (I’m still holdin’) (I’m holdin’ on) (I’m still holdin’) (I’m holdin’ on) (I’m still holdin’)
Barely holding on to you (I’m still holdin’ on)
Barely holding on to you

Thoughts? Lifehouse was never a fave of mine in the past, but they might be growing on me now? I'm not really sure, but this song touched something that I'm not sure I'm ready to explore or look at. But I guess the point is something was touched?

You Might Be a Writer...

This cracked me up....Shar - you'll appreciate this...

This list compiled by Gina Ardio has been making the rounds with writers and it cracked me up because a lot of it is true. See if you recognize any of these:

If your partner is jealous of your computer ...you might be a writer.

If you've spent ten hours in your pajamas, drinking coffee, and consider it a productive work day ...you might be a writer.

If, in the throes of passion, you pretend to be your heroine ...you might be a writer.

If your first thought when you suffer an illness or injury is, "I have to remember what this feels like!" ...you might be a writer.

If you plot an annoying acquaintance's grisly murder ...you might be a writer.

If you're the only person in the emergency room jotting down details of the staff's activities...you might be a writer.

If you've crawled into a car's trunk to see how a dead body would fit ...you might be a writer.

If you spend over $50 at the bookstore and call it research ...you might be a writer.

Change

Change is daunting, is it not? I remember deciding that it was absolutely necessary to get out of my hometown and move on to "bigger and better" things. After all, being an adult is the way to go...right? The freedom you get, the independence, is exhilarating and exciting. For the first few weeks, anyway...

I got into a routine though...one that I loved. Everything finally meshed this semester. It only took 2 years in a completely different lifestyle... (did anyone note the sarcasm there...?)

But really, I'm surrounded by people I genuinely love. I'm in a major that for the first time actually feels right, even if it's kicking my ass every step of the way. Up until a week ago, I was wholly surrounded by my best friends and some of the best people I know (with the exception of a few who have never lived here with me).

A little over a week ago, one of the best people I know developed a medical problem and shook everything up. You know who you are...and you know how much I miss you. I won't go into that again ...haha! But the whole reason for this particular post is not for me to rant about how unfair it is that she, of all people, got what she got. Because she's at peace with it, which should logically translate to me being at peace with it....right?

I suppose. But life is never that cut and dry, is it.

For the first time since St. Paul, I'm starting to question again. Funny how it didn't take Mormor's death or the ever-increasing realization that life is not finite and it does not slow down. It took one little episode from a girl who, up until said episode, I saw every day. Consequently, that girl has the strongest most unfaltering faith I have ever seen. A 20-year-old girl in college. If you're reading this, Es, I truly am in awe of you.

Anywho, all this got me thinking. And by thinking, I mean I avoided that 'thinking' by picking up a book and closing myself off from the "real world" and delving into the paranormal. (I know...right! Me, reading paranormal? Who would have thought...? But that's another discussion for another day..) The point of that tangent was to point out that I came across a passage in a particularly dark novel said by an even more dark character...who I now happen to adore. Here it is:

"Here's the thing, though. I believe that there is a hand that guides us. It isn't always a gentle one. Or one that seems fair at the time. But, I dunno, I try to trust in it now. When I freak, I just try to...shit, I guess trust in it. Because at the end of the day, what else can you do? Choice only gets you so far. Reasoning and planning, too. The rest...it's up to someone else. Where we end up, who we know, what happens to the people we love...we don't have a lot of control over any of it." (Zsadist from Lover Unbound, p 490)

Deep...right? But so...I dunno. Right out of my own head just worded more beautifully than I could ever hope to write. After everything happened with Es, my immediate thought was this passage. And I guess I shouldn't be surprised I remembered it, seeing as I've read the books 3 times each, minimum. But the fact that I can link a vampire romance novel to my thoughts and life and faith is kinda kick-ass...

No?